Exploring Your Relationship with Exercise

Author: Breanna Mills R.D.

We all receive many messages about movement and exercise and how we “should” be engaging in it. The popular narrative around movement often focuses on exercising in order to look a certain way. This can lead to an overfocus on weight, shape, and appearance, and can contribute to movement feeling like an obligation. Over time, this has the potential to contribute to a disordered relationship with exercise.

Any movement can be beneficial, and how someone chooses to move their body will vary. There is no “right” way to move. Since the popular narrative around exercise often involves punishment, obligation, and changing our bodies, it can be confusing to identify whether your relationship with exercise is becoming problematic or negatively impacting you.

A gentle reminder: a problematic relationship with exercise is individualized. How one person chooses to move may be perfectly appropriate for them but problematic for you, and vice versa.

Here are some questions to help you consider how you are feeling about your relationship with exercise (Calogero & Pedrotty, 2007):

• Do I want to exercise because of what I ate today?

• Is there another activity I would rather be doing today instead of exercising?

• What exactly would I like to be doing right now?

• Is today a rest day? What exactly would I like to do with my day?

• Am I feeling guilty because I do not think I am exercising enough?

• Am I avoiding exercise today because I am uncomfortable with my body?

• Do I want to exercise alone so no one will interfere with what I do?

• Do I feel that if I cannot do everything I planned for exercise, then I do not want to do any of it?

• Did I enjoy this exercise the last time I did it?

A problematic relationship with exercise isn’t necessarily defined by the intensity or frequency of exercise. Instead, it is more focused on how we feel about exercise and how it impacts our lives and wellbeing.

If you feel that your relationship with exercise is impacting your wellbeing, it may be helpful to focus on engaging in joyful movement. Joyful movement is fun and offers freedom, flexibility, and choice. It supports connection and attunement to the body’s cues, allowing us to listen to how we feel and make choices based on that information.

Rest, nourishment, and hydration are essential parts of changing your relationship with exercise and supporting your wellbeing. Moving in a joyful way can be challenging when the brain and body aren’t getting the basic nourishment they need for survival. Exercise can then further deplete the body, and some of the potential benefits of activity may be lost as a result.

So, how do I start?

For some people, starting to adjust their relationship with movement might involve taking a break from exercise. Taking some space from feelings of obligation and rigidity around exercise may allow for reflection and provide an opportunity to consider how exercise is impacting you.

For many people, we have beliefs about what “counts” as exercise. One way to start changing your relationship with exercise could be to ask yourself: If I believed all movement was worthwhile, what would I want to be doing?

You might also consider:

• What types of activities do I find fun?

• What types of activities help me connect to myself rather than focus on changing my body?

• What activities did I enjoy as a child?

• What activities did I enjoy at a time in my life when I wasn’t thinking about my body?

If you find that exploring your relationship with movement is bringing up challenging thoughts and emotions, it may be helpful to explore this in a supportive space with a care team or trusted support person.

Sources:

Calogero, R., & Pedrotty, K. (2007). Daily Practices for Mindful Exercise. Low-Cost Approaches to Promote Physical and Mental Health, 141-160. doi:10.1007/0-387-36899-x_7

Edmonds, I. (n.d.). Joyful movement. FREEDcan. https://media-002-ca.cdn.govstack.com/freedcan-010-ca/media/hn4jeuia/joyful-movement-resource.pdf